5-Steps To In-Control for When Things Are Not!

Heartbroken. That’s how I feel about the Ukrainian crisis. Heartbroken, in awe of the Ukrainians and, when someone here in the U.S. told me he already had his survival kit assembled, I also felt a bit scared.

This brings me to something called Locus of Control — for how to cope — with things that feel outside of our control.

What is Locus of Control?

Locus of control (LOC), first defined by psychologist Julian Rotter in 1966, is our perception of the causes of the events and experiences in our lives.

External LOC is a perception that things are happening to us, that our successes and failures are caused by factors external to us.

People with internal LOC, by contrast, do not think things happen to them by luck or fate. Rather, they have a sense of ‘agency’. They see themselves in control of whether they succeed or fail in work and life. This means, above all, having control over ourselves—because sometimes we exercise our so called ‘agency’ just to reassure our shaky selves when anxiety rules the day. Here is an earlier post for that.

But let’s also be clear that, when we say internal LOC, we are not talking about an internalized version of someone else’s ideas for us. It is, rather, that deeper and truer internal voice of our own. 

This does not mean, however, that the voices of valued others are not in the mix along the way of our lives. Scott Mautz distinguishes between “solo-powered” and “solar-powered” to make the point that in-control people draw on the “heat and energy” of others, precisely because they understand it is not possible to control things all by themselves.

Internal versus External LOC

High internal LOC (“There is something I can do”) has been found to exceed external LOC (“It’s all out of my hands”) on a variety of parameters that matter to us. These include: general happiness, healthier lifestyles, less obesity, academic success, greater confidence, and lower stress levels.

Other benefits of high internal LOC include: 136% of employees more likely to love their career, 148% more likely to recommend their company as great to work for, and 113% more likely to give their best effort at work.

As with most if not all human traits, we are all likely somewhere along a continuum with external LOC on one end and internal LOC on the other. Thus, it can be said that we are each, in general, relatively high or low, internal or external, LOC.

Where is Your Locus of Control?

Now you want to know which one you are? Here below is how you can tell whether you are dominant internal or external LOC.

Internal Locus of Control

• • Are more likely to take responsibility for their actions
  • Tend to be less influenced by the opinions of other people
  • Often do better at tasks when they are allowed to work at their own pace
  • Usually, have a strong sense of self-efficacy
  • Tend to work hard to achieve the things they want
  • Feel confident in the face of challenges
  • Tend to be physically healthier
  • Report being happier and more independent
  • Often achieve greater success in the workplace

External Locus of Control

• • Blame outside forces for their circumstances
  • Often credit luck or chance for any successes
  • Don’t believe that they can change their situation through their own efforts
  • Frequently feel hopeless or powerless in the face of difficult situations
  • Are more prone to experiencing learned helplessness

There is a time and a place for everything, including external LOC. Let’s say whatever has gone bad really was outside of your control. Putting all the responsibility on the self, true or not, can damage self-esteem enough to interfere with believing there is anything we can do about anything at all.

How to Regulate Locus of Control

That said, given the benefits of internal LOC, here is a 5-step adaptation of an exercise I found online to help us get more internal LOC when we need it:

1. Imagine a situation over which you feel you have no control.
2. Make a list of all the things in this situation that you do not control.
3. Make a list of aspects of the situation that you do control. (This list has to be as long as the list of do not’s.)
4. Now, focus on and build on the list of what you can control. Let it inspire you to expand on what else you can control that you might not have realized at the start.
5. And then, time for action.

So here is what I did about the Ukraine situation, over which I don’t have a lot of control, let’s face it. But it’s not 100% none, so here is what I did about what I could control.

First, I made a donation to support the Ukrainians. Then I had a conversation with my family, after which I ordered a survival kit to support our survival plan, just in case. Maybe you would think it is too much, or not enough. You get to decide for yourself.

For me, until and unless I think of something else to do or not do…I did what I did and feel good to go for now.

To talk more about this or something else, please leave a comment or contact me at https://madelaineweiss.com/

Warm wishes,

Madelaine

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